Let’s Make America Polite Again
With travel complaints up 270% (pre-pandemic), air travel can feel as dystopian as the AppleTV show “Severance.” Sure, we Americans were never “Canadian polite,” but we can do better than where we are collectively today.
In the last 30 days and 25k+ miles of travel, I’ve seen plenty of bad behaviors within airport terminals. Here’s a list of air travel do’s and don’ts that can help improve the communal traveling experience.
Don’t take a phone call or, even worse, a FaceTime call on speaker while in the terminal or waiting to take off. Learn to speak quietly and use your earbuds — strangers don’t want to hear your conversation.
Don’t set up what looks like a yard sale when you sit in the gate area. Make yourself as small as possible. That means your bags go in front of you, not around you like some sort of luggage Stonehenge. Do not cross your legs into the next seating area. This is a shared space: take a seat and smile when someone sits next to you.
Don’t be gross. Don’t clip your nails, paint your nails or groom yourself beyond combing your hair or reapplying lipstick. Shower, wear deodorant and clean clothes. If you wear socks and shoes to the airport, please keep both on at all times. (For international travelers, please don’t be tempted — storing your dirty socks anywhere other than your bag is gross.) I do have a non-scientific theory that you are more likely to be upgraded if you dress the part.
Do eat in the restaurant if you can. If you cannot, eat quietly and finish as fast as possible. Do not eat something that will leave a mess on or around you. Do not leave wrappers and crumbs after you’re done. I watched a grown man shake like a dog to rid himself of his leftover crumbs in a crowded space of travelers. Do not eat aromatic food. Now is not the time to add extra garlic and onions or to order a tuna sandwich. Think before you order, and think extra hard before you bring food onto a plane.
Do respect older travelers and those with special needs. They deserve to travel without having to fight for space and access from younger or more able-bodied passengers. You deserve to be punished (like middle row between two drunk linebackers on an international flight punished) if you think it’s not your responsibility to make it easier for them to travel.
Do offer support. Believe it or not, our society’s construct is based on the unspoken promise that it is your responsibility to help people in need. Offer to help them with getting their luggage into the bin or make space for them as they leave their seat. Flight attendants only get paid from the time you hear the captain say “arm the doors” to “disarm the doors,” so do your part to help people. Imagine dealing with travelers while boarding and leaving the plane like flight attendants do and not getting paid. Be kind and say thank you.
Do learn how to count: two bags, group five, and row 28 shouldn’t be that hard to navigate. You should not be surprised when your group is called, nor should you have to read every row as you walk down the aisle. No one is trying to trick you — numbers are pretty consistent.
Don’t treat the plane like a gym. Despite your choice to wear all Lululemon, now isn’t the time to prove your mastery of yoga. It’s ok to stretch your legs to and from the lavatory. Totally ok to roll your shoulders and neck. But please stop short of standing in the aisle and becoming an airborne pretzel. Traveling is hard on your body, but be polite and recognize that your natarajasana pose is not appropriate. Here are a few yoga positions that you can do in your seat if you have the space.
Do wait your turn. When exiting your row of seats, do not try to go out of turn. Help those around you — then go. Feel free to walk extra fast in the terminal to compensate for the seven seconds you “lost” by not being rude.
Do walk consciously through the terminal. Don’t walk three-to-five people wide in slow-mo like you’re in a rom-com. Do not stop in the middle of the walkway to check your phone or which pocket holds your ticket. Make your way over to the wall if you want to stop. This area is also not a playground. Managing a family while traveling can be hard but letting kids run amuck in the way of other travelers is rude. Be mindful of your bag as you walk. Your luggage is an extension of you — clipping other people or bumping into others is the opposite of polite.
Do manage your emotions. If you feel an emotion other than happiness, bottle it up. This is not the time to be a “Karen” or a “Kevin.” The person behind the counter had nothing to do with the storm that delayed your flight or the mechanical issue that grounded your plane. No matter how many miles you have or how important your travel is, acting out in a show of rage (false self-importance) will get you nothing but disappointment. Be a zen master. Be calm. Ask for help without explaining your mileage status or your title at the company where you work. Just be calm, say thanks, and ask the people who are trying to help if there is anything that you can do on your end of things to help.
Don’t judge or be rude to someone for wearing a mask. In other (more polite) countries, they wear masks to keep others from getting sick — well before the days of COVID. Our government knew we wouldn’t do that, so they marketed masks to keep you from getting sick. It works both ways, but someone wearing a mask might just be trying to NOT share their cold with you. If you are sick, do not travel. If you think you might be sick or are at the tail end of your cold — please wear a mask.
Airplane travel is an amazing human accomplishment. It was once a semi-formal event (suits and ties and white gloves and fancy hats), but things have obviously changed. While I won’t pass up the more comfortable travel wear, I wouldn’t mind a resurgence in common courtesy. Let’s be kind to each other, have fun, smile, and choose to be polite (again).
